Ask Amber: I Am Addicted to Facetune

August 31, 2025

Question

Dear Amber,

I’ve noticed lately that my relationship with social media is becoming a bit unhealthy. It started out with just a quick Facetune edit here and there to smooth out a blemish or adjust the lighting. But now, every single photo I take needs to go through an editing process before it’s good enough to post.

I’m fully aware that this is an incredibly unhealthy habit, and that social media is fake, but I still can’t help but compare myself to the people on my feed and feel this underlying pressure to look perfect. It’s not just about wanting to look good anymore; it’s about feeling like I won’t get validation if I don’t put out a curated version of myself.

I’m really struggling with it. I want to feel comfortable in my own skin, but I can’t help but worry that people will judge me or that I won’t measure up to the flawless images everyone else is sharing. I feel like I’ve lost touch with what my real self looks like outside of the edits and Facetune.

How do I break this cycle? I want to embrace my natural self and stop feeling like I need to make every photo perfect, but it’s tough when the pressure to look a certain way is constantly in my face. How can I start sharing the unfiltered version of myself?

Answer

Thank you so much for reaching out with this one. This is a problem I’m sure more people can relate to than care to admit it.

While social media offers a lot of wonderful benefits, it’s also a breeding ground of comparisons that we were never meant to have access to. Humans aren’t meant to be able to see what millions of people are doing around the world at a touch of a button. This has been made worse by the fact that it’s only the really good bits that are ever posted. No wonder we feel the pressure to present our best selves to the world all the time.

It’s interesting that you notice your editing is coming from a place of needing validation. My first step would be to step back, and check in with yourself about why it is you feel you need that validation from social media. Often, we need more external validation when we are struggling with our relationship with ourselves and our ability to self validate. I think it is really important for you to understand what is at the root of the problem, rather than just addressing the symptom (the facetune).

While I think you will find the urge to do this decreases as you address the underlying issue here, there are a couple of ways to break this pattern. You could lean into a good old fashion social media cleanse. Take some time away from the apps to ground yourself in the real world again. Next, delete Facetune. Having the app installed is making it easy for you to jump in and edit your photos. Lastly I would set yourself a challenge to upload maybe some stories first, and then posts of yourself with no filters or editing. Do it as an experiment, and observe what happens.

I’m proud of you for addressing this head on, and I wish you all the best.

Read more of Ambers advice here.

Meet Amber Sargeant, The Modern Muse's resident psychologist, however, you might know her better as The Anxious Psych on TikTok or from her clinic The Sunshine Club Psychology. With a Masters of Professional Psychology, and a Masters of Psychology Practice (Clinical) under her belt, Amber works with all different kinds of presentations from anxiety and depression to personality disorders, ADHD, and everything in between. Her TikTok forms a community hub for accessible information about mental health and psychology in a way that is more approachable and understandable to the average person.